The first step in becoming a better you, as we all know is acknowledging there is an issue.  My mom denied what was happening for many years, and therefore, we denied it too.  As I continue telling my story, you'll see and realize this is very common and how harmful it is.  Had we been able to ask for help, I truly believe we could have saved her.  

Step 1:  Find yourself a therapist.  If you don't feel comfortable with one, find a different one.  It's ok, not all personalities mesh. Find one that gets you and makes you feel better at the end of each session.  

Step 2: Google and research domestic violence, effects of physical abuse, sexual abuse, verbal abuse, abandonment, narcissists, and any other terms that you find in your research that help you understand why you're you.  

Step 3:  Understand you have a choice.  You can stop the chain of violence.  I've always said and believed that the best revenge to someone who treats me poorly is my happiness.  Abusers really hate that.  They enjoy controlling you by making you miserable.  It's how they keep you under their control.  Just because they show you and allow you good times, doesn't mean they care about you and love you the way you deserve to be cared about and loved.  It's just another form of manipulation they are using to continue their control.