1.11
To honor the 1-year anniversary of mom's passing, today's post is going to be about her.
If you knew her, you loved her. It was that simple. I know if some of my posts, I do express my frustration with her not standing up to dad. Both Brian and I feel that way. I will firmly state that a mother's only job in life is to protect her kids. For those of you out there going through the same thing, that is a normal feeling that you will have. But we also have to recognize too, that my mom was a victim even if at the time, she didn't realize that she was. She did believe in the beginning that she could handle dad. She knew he wasn't perfect, but she didn't realize just how manipulating he really was.
Mom made everyone feel like she was their best friend. During my high-school years, mom worked as a manager at McDonald's. The kids loved working with her. They could come to her for advice without judgement. She made you feel important. She always had a smile for everyone. She cared about everyone too. If you needed help, she would try to find a way. Even if someone was just using her for her kindness and she knew it, she would still help. There were some occasions that I would have to step in and tell her that she doesn't need to keep helping this person, they are just using you. She would say she knew they were, but still felt like she wanted to help.
She would give people her last dollar and never complain that she needed for anything. I know people always say their loves ones who have died were fabulous people, but mom really was. If I was mad at my husband and went to her, she didn't just take my side. She would listen, try to help me realize what his side may be. She didn't say I was right, and he was wrong or vice versa.
It didn't matter who you were or where you came from, if you were alone on a holiday, you were invited to become part of the family for that holiday and any others if you needed. Many of our holidays were more friends than they were family members and those were just as awesome. Because of her, I wasn't never jealous when others needed to talk to mom. I knew I was lucky to have her, and that person was lucky too.
Mom taught me so many things. Here are just a few that I hope you take into your own lives.
She always told me to be strong and not put up with anyone who doesn't treat me the way I want to be treated. Because of this, I can allow myself to walk away from toxic people. Don't feel like you have to keep toxic people in your life. If they really cared about you, they would treat you well.
She always told me to make a memory. Even as small kids, we would be sitting outside just enjoying nature. We did the now referred to Nature Bathing back before it was a thing. I have so many fond memories because of this. I would just sit back and enjoy the moment and listen to the sounds. An adult, I've run into people who have never stopped to smell the flowers or listen to the birds sing. It's sad they've missed so much. I hope you stop and make a memory, of the moment, of your family, of the things happening around you.
She taught me to be inclusive and to be kind to everyone. A quick visit to the store would often end up in standing and talking to people for hours. I mean hours. And even though we could complain because we got tired and bored, it taught me how much her conversation meant to others. There were times after we'd walk away, where I would ask her who that was. She would giggle and tell me she didn't know who that was. Of course we would give her crap. But I understand. People would come to her just because she looked friendly. Please be kind. Her kindness did not go unnoticed and will not be forgotten. I encourage you to make people feel like they belong and to care about them. You may be all they have at that moment.
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